Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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