this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
