this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
