conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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