too bad you live with your parents still
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize