We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
