we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
