Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize