I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
