it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
