So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I just googled if crying burns calories
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Randomize