What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
