if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
