She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
