So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
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