We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize