Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Randomize