Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
