as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
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