is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
birth control should be required to get into college
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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