and you said cock pushups were impossible
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
did you just send me my own nude
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
