Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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