does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
