Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
