So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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