Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
