I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
