i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
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