My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
