I hate your face
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Randomize
