Don't you send me to vm
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
