I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
