You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
