Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
