why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
