man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Randomize
