Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Randomize
