All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
