nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
well most of my day revolves around power hour
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
