Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
