Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize