good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
