spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Randomize
