I love black thongs
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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