Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
