The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
