Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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