So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Be still, my beating vagina.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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