So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
You are a genius and a whore.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
