On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize
