Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Duck Duck Cougar?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
Randomize
