butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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